Another deconstruction, another emptiness from which an unknown self will emerge. She is gone, whoever I used to be. I keep trying to summon her up, out of habit, but she is simply not here. My whole body, it is trying to become new as well. But for that, a bit of death is needed. A bit of death is compulsory for any act of rebirth, for any miraculous transformation. Death as shedding, death as old skin itching to come off, death as a body that is relearning how to be. Death as a waiting for someone who is more myself than I used to be to arrive. Let us be here now- let every dying part fall, let every new piece of skin be felt.
In Tantra, death is revered and meditated upon as a form of the Divine that invites us to embody the essence of our impermanent nature back into the still, unbounded void [Siva]. Despite compelling appearances of separation and diversity, the worldview of Tantra sees everything as one unity consciousness, one reality, one divinity. Death is just an expression of our consciousness that is ready to let go of its manifest-form and to rejoice back into the sea on consciousness. What is important to know from the view of Tantra is that consciousness takes a form in physical and non-physical aspects of form such as in words, thoughts, emotions, seasons, relationships, physical body, you name it. All that we can experience through the human senses of touch, feel, see, smell, taste is a manifestation of consciousness expressing itself as something in a particular form. If that holds true, then “death” happens at every moment in many forms, but consciousness itself is not dying, it is only just rekindling back to its state of expansion [siva] until its ready to take form again. This is all a part of the divine play [leela] of consciousness that is the universal nature of expansion and contraction in-and-out of consciousness-form. You see, a part of us dies in every moment: every time a conversation ends, every time we go to sleep, every time we say goodbye, and every time we experience a transition in life. Death is but a never-ending cycle of growth, change, and a journey back to the truest Self.
QUOTES ABOUT SEASONS
One of my favourite contemplations to explore is the nature of seasons within us as we are a reflection of nature and its five elements. So what we see in nature can be experienced within our own human bodies. Realising that we are a part of a larger cycle of life in which there is time for growing, a time for blooming, and a time for dying, we experience the life force at work in every season. Here are a few of my favourite quotes to contemplate.
1. “Be aware of what season you are in and give yourself the grace to be there.” — Kristen Dalton
2. “All the trees are losing their leaves, and not one of them is worried.” — Donald Miller
3. “When the winds of change blow, remember… sometimes what appears dead is simply preparing for a new season.” — Jane Lee Logan
4. “The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.” — Alan W. Watts
5. “Trust the wait. Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming. When nothing is certain, anything is possible.” — Mandy Hale
6. “The moment in between what you once were, and who you are now becoming, is where the dance of life really takes place.” — Barbara De Angelis